The Lord is always teaching me something. I know that is a good thing, it means that I am growing in Him. However, it seems that I must be a very slow learner. The reason that I say this is because any given concept that He is teaching me seems to require lessons without number. The latest series has been concerning worldly things. First, there was the "trash can saga" as Joel has named it. The short version of a long,drawn-out story is: Clare leaves for Texas. Clare comes home. Clare takes out trash bag. What?! No trash can. Housing charges $50 fine. Clare is very,very angry. So, I am trying to be Christian about that, but it is hard when it is "not my fault". However, the Bible doesn't say that I only have to act like Jesus when it is my fault. As a matter of fact, I think it actually says to turn the other cheek.
Anyhow, story number 2 involves my double-stroller. After a string of mishaps due to poor manufacturing the final straw came when the cup-holder BROKE OFF! It left an ugly, sharp edge and generally made the whole thing look quite ghetto. So another long story: Clare contacts Graco. String of emails follows. Graco says, "Send stroller back- at your expense- and we will refund your money. I should be happy, right? Wrong! Try mailing a 35 lb. double-stroller and see how easy it is! $85- yes, that's right, almost $100- later, I mailed it today and we will see what happens. I am not holding my breath!
So, I am putting around today, stewing about both situations alternately; because surely that will make it better, right? No, oddly enough, I just continued to get more frustrated. Then, I'm thinking,"Why can't things just work out for me?" Well, then I heard Someone remind me that these things are just temporary. I am so concerned about my "things" that I get all worked up. The trashcan is somewhat symptomatic of a bigger problem but really right now what I can do about it? It is just a thing. The stroller actually is as resolved as I can do anything about. I just have to wait to see what Graco actually does (I am more than a little afraid to believe that they will actually send my money back).
I am usually so proud of myself because I really feel like I have a free hand with my things. These events (and others) have shown me that I am more attached to my possessions than I would like to admit. You don't shed tears, waste time worrying over, or yell about things that you don't care about. I have never considered myself materialistic but it seems that it is being proven otherwise. I really don't want to be that way. It reminds me of my dad who always says it is silly to call an inanimate object stupid. Something that doesn't have a soul, that doesn't last for eternity, is not worth expending my energy over. If I am not using my material possesions to benefit the Lord the Bible pretty clearly says it is a waste. So, here it is: my confession that I love things a little too much and I am ready to break free of my addiction. My own rule of thumb is: if something won't be important five years from now it shouldn't be a cause for concern now. So, with that in mind I will work towards letting go. I think it might be harder than I will want it to be. But don't they say, "No pain, no gain"? Please open my hands, Lord...