All Talk, No Action!

I realized that sometimes we get confused about the meaning of the word "help". I looked it up ('cause I'm good like that). According to the American Heritage Dictionary it means:
(v.)
To give assistance to; aid: I helped her find the book. He helped me into my coat.
help
(v.)
To be of service; give assistance.
help
(n.)
The act or an instance of helping.

We often think that we are helping someone when we give them our opinion. Wrong! I was really thinking about Job's "friends" (I use that term loosely because I wouldn't want friends like that!). They really felt that they were aiding Job but I think really they were just comforting themselves. They wanted to believe that Job was suffering because of his sin, therefore because they weren't suffering, they must be blameless. They had a superiority complex.

But that really isn't the point of this post. It is really that often when someone when is hurting, or needs real assistance, we "help" by offering platitudes, or worse, we point out their flaws. I found myself doing this the other day. My friend didn't need my advice, she didn't need me to talk about her to others, she didn't need me to point out what she was doing wrong. Why couldn't I just have actually done something? Why does all my aid have to consist of words? No where in that definition do I see that help is an, "abundance of words that make the speaker feel superior". Sometimes we need to keep our words to ourselves. Even when we are "right", even when we are sure we know what the other person has done wrong, even when we feel justified. I need to remember more often that I am not called to be any one's Holy Spirit. It is not my place to evaluate their motives or point out their flaws. Even if it just seems like pointless complaining, my job is to help like Jesus would. He was a lot more action than talk!

Taking Notice

I was listening to the radio this morning on my way to my moms' group at church and a song (I think it may have been by Caedmon's Call, but I was too lazy to look it up) had a line in it that really caught my attention. I had heard the song before but this morning something about "we delight in the Son who was perfect from birth" got me to thinking. At first, I thought, "What a pleasure for Mary, to know that her Son would never cause her normal childhood grief." No lying, yelling, laying on the floor demanding a sucker...well, I digress. Then as my mind continued to wander I started to think about how even as a child, Jesus must have stood out. I think everyone has worked with children in some capacity. When can all think the reasons the memorable ones stand out, and it is not usually because of their model behavior! Surely, everyone would take notice of a perfect child. I wonder if Mary's friends tried to convince her to write a book on parenting, or if they just secretly entertained thoughts that surely He must be a brat at home. But no matter what they thought, they must have taken notice.

I am sure that is why the Bible says, "Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect." (Matthew 5:48) Jesus, as He always was, is the best example of this. His behavior polarized public opinion, but whatever the verdict, people took notice. Oh, that is how I long to be! I want to be so different, so ideal, that people stop and take a closer look. Even as a little child, Jesus grew in grace and wisdom, in favor with God and man (Luke 2:52). Why can't I as an adult, manage to do that most of the time? The obvious answer, of course, is that I am not Christ; however, I would like to be a little deeper than that. I have access to all of His power. I want to model the best behavior for my family, my friends but most of all to draw the unsaved nearer to the Perfect One. I can follow the example of a Child on this one. I think the next time I am having a bad day I will remind myself that if a 5 year-old can do it (even if He did have supernatural powers), surely I can!

Facebook Rant

I have a tendency to jump on the bandwagon-I don't want to miss out on anything fun. So, to that end I pulled up my Facebook page yesterday because several people had been talking about their pages lately. I started it back in March and did...nothing. Well, I have decided that it is a voyeuristic way to spy on everyone! I know it isn't really, but I thought it was so you could keep up with your friends and acquaintances. Not really! There is no way to sustain a conversation, and every comment that someone leaves, since part of one that is on their own Wall, you have no idea what they are talking about. It doesn't really help you to keep up with anyone. I know it is based on sociological principles, etc. That doesn't mean the concept works. It is supposed to show how we are all connected but really I think it just exemplifies our grown-up cliques! I don't know... maybe as my dad always said, I just think it is stupid because I don't understand it. Maybe I don't want to understand it, maybe I just like my blog!

Faith and Fairy Tales

Jocelyn has long been a fan of "Cinderella" but yesterday we discovered the magic that is "Sleeping Beauty". Since we only have one television (the other one went kaput shortly after Joel left, of course, and the little DVD player bit the dust long ago) I have seen it three times since yesterday afternoon. I normally try to limit the amount of time she watches T.V. but I was being lazy. Anyway, since I have been forced to listen to the three fairies bicker and Aurora Rose pine for her prince so many times it has set my mind to wandering. I was really contemplating the part where Rose is "cursed" by the wicked queen. Right away the little blue fairy counteracts the curse by bestowing a promise on the baby that instead of dying on her 16th birthday she would merely sleep until awakened by her true love's kiss. Okay, we are all familiar with that part. But what confounded me is why did her father still insist on burning all the spinning wheels? Also, why was it necessary to sweep Rose away from her parents into hiding? Didn't they believe in the blue fairy's power? Hadn't she shown it before? If I was her parents I would have spent a lot more time trying to find her true love then trying to hide her from the evil witch. He was the one who would save her, she couldn't get away from the dying part, really. Rose's life had already been promised to be kept safe, right?

Then I had a sudden realization (caution: it gets a bit scary because I start making spiritual approximations!). Isn't that exactly what we do to God? He shows us His power all the time, and He is perfect in His strength and might (or so we say). Yet, He makes us promises and we go around trying to secure them on our own, under the guise that we are being careful, or "realistic", moves that are usually highly lauded by friends and family. I mean look at Abraham. He had been promised a son, by the same God who "cut the covenant" with him. Yet, he still tried to force the issue by having a child with Hagar, with Sarah's approval! Look at all the trouble that got him into! The same with poor Sleeping Beauty. Not only was she separated from her parents for 16 years, but she still had to suffer from the curse, but was also saved by the promise. Wouldn't things have been easier if she had just trusted the promise and lived her life gracefully and fully, not fearfully and in hiding?

Whoa! There I am again. Not believing that He "works all things for my good" that He has a "future and a plan" for me, not trusting that He "is with me always". He has given me much greater promise, my salvation and eternal place in heaven. Why then do I live this life, such a tiny portion of the bigger picture, so afraid? Why do I try to take care of myself when I have a Perfect Provider?

Lord, I want to live my life secure in your promises. I don't want to try to feebly circumvent bad things when You have the power to turn what is bad into something good.Please forgive me for the times I have tried to do what only You can. Thank You for being the most Powerful, Perfect God. Thank you for loving me even when I have such puny faith. Guide me in Your way and teach me.

I am so glad that Jesus loves me! I am thankful He can take anything the evil one throws at me and turn it into good. I am also thankful for Josie and her love for good triumphing over evil. Although, I do think this is the last time we will watch "Sleeping Beauty" today, no matter the spiritual significance!

Discipline...Or Lack Thereof

Okay, so I think that any day that goes really well and is filled with spiritual revelations must be immediately followed by a day that makes you want to pull all your hair (or perhaps your 2, almost 3 year-old's) out by the roots! Today made Thursday seem like a dream! We experienced the mother of all Target meltdowns today. I am talking tears, screaming, unkind words, threats and staring (from the poor shoppers forced to witness the terror). The whole experience was one of those that has been niggling at me all day like popcorn stuck in my teeth. What did I do wrong?

The day actually started pretty well (should I start taking that as a sign?). We had lunch and then went to Target. I had to go back because the other day we accidentally removed an item from the store that we hadn't paid for (yes, you can read that "stolen" because we took it, albeit unintentionally). Sooo, I got frustrated as soon as we got out because Josie had taken her shoes off. It only took us 5 minutes to get there-why did she take off her socks and shoes? Definitely just to vex me. Anyway, we got in the store. There were great deals everywhere! All the school/college clearance was 75% off. I am getting pretty excited when I discover Josie had removed her shoes (and of course her socks) AGAIN! Not happy, Bob, not happy. In the process of replacing them (actually yelling at her to do so) I find a book from Ross that is (cue drums) not paid for! You've got to be kidding me! I am certain at some point I am going to be arrested. You can only be allowed so many of these "mistakes" before someone assumes that you are just lying. At this point Josie is crying, Carson is crying (of course all pacifiers are safe-in Josie's purse because isn't that where they belong-in the car!) and I am about to cry. Issuing threats between clenched teeth, we go back to school supplies. At some point while deciding between lunchboxes for $2.98 Josie loses it. Weeping and gnashing of teeth ensue. So much for $7 backpacks and $5 lamps-we are headed at the door, all of us wailing the whole way. The clerk had the audacity to tell me , "Have a nice day!" Could she not see that I was on the edge of violence? Every tearful Picker loaded in the truck and Josie starts mumbling through her tears. I unkindly bite out, "What is wrong, now?!" Then I realize she is saying the dreaded phrase, "I want my daddy!" I was crushed. He is always the disciplinarian, I am the comforter. What did I do?

I apologize, she apologizes and we head to another Target (okay, I am a glutton for punishment, but also a sucker for a sale!). We successfully navigate the 2nd Target (good deals had all around). But I am still reeling. I prayed, I know the Lord knows our hearts. I just kept replaying the drama. Somehow, I feel like Josie's behavior can be excused, but I am an adult. I did not maintain self-control, so how can I expect her to? I remembered (too late this time) Dr. Dobson's sage advice to apply disciplinary action "anywhere along the timeline that it is convenient for you, the closer it moves to the front of the conflict, the better." Thankfully, I will have another chance to remember that I am the mom. I do not have to cower in the face of a toddler tantrum. I can be forgiven, and victorious. Here's to next time!