Friday, October 3, 2014

To Gracelyn, When You Were Born

Dear Gracey,
                           I'm your Aunt Clare. We haven't met yet, a fact that makes me super sad, especially since I was there for all of your siblings' births. But it just didn't work out this time. But that doesn't keep me from loving you and wishing I was there to kiss your chubby cheeks!

      And I also wish I was there for your mom. We've been through a lot together, she and I. And what she is going through with you is probably the hardest road she has ever had to travel. Because you have a "special" heart. It isn't quite what it is supposed to be, and in your short few days here you've had more medical tests and procedures done than I have had in my whole life. I don't understand it all, but literally part of your heart is missing, and that has caused so many other problems...

    But never doubt for a moment these things: you were WANTED and you are LOVED. Your mom and Dad found out this summer that your heart was"broken" and they never for one second thought about anything but how to help you. All they ever have wanted is to care for you and love you. Your mom's heart is breaking in it's own way because she can't fix this.

   And your Dad, well, I am sure that he is just trying to figure out how to be there for your mom without falling apart himself. He would give his own heart for you, I know. He would give anything to make this better, to make it go away...

   And how do I know this? Because that is how I feel, and I'm not even your mom. But I love your mom, she's my big sister. And its tearing me up that I can't *do* anything. But you better believe, I haven't for one minute quit praying for you. I know the Lord keeps bringing this Scripture to mind for a reason:

"As He (Jesus) went along, he saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked Him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?” “Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him." John 9:1-3 (NIV)

    I don't know what is going to happen to you, sweet Gracey. I would love to think that you will be allowed to meet your brother and sisters, know their love, sleep in your own bed, get to try ice cream, fight with your siblings, swing on a swing...  But I don't know that. But I can promise you-your life will be for God's glory. How do I know that? Because it already is! You have been so prayed for-you and your whole family. All of your doctors and medical professionals. Everyone around you has been covered in prayer long before you were born.

   And I believe that you can be healed. That you will get to do all those things and so much more. I have hope-and that is so much more than wishing on a star. My hope is concrete-based on the Truth that is Jesus, and so I don't have to fear. I am sad,sad for your parents, sad for you-this is so hard. But I don't have to fear, because you were created in His image, and not one thing that has happened to you has escaped His notice, never for even a part of a second have you been out of His care. And if I love you so much that I can't hardly stand it, imagine how He feels?

   When we found out about your heart your Aunt Katy shared these verses with your mom, and they became "yours". And today, especially, they hold so much meaning and comfort.

"Whom have I in heaven but you?    And earth has nothing I desire besides you.  
My flesh and my heart may fail,    but God is the strength of my heart    and my portion forever." 
                                     Psalm 73:25-26

       He is, Gracey, He is! The strength of your "broken" heart, and mine. I'm so glad that I don't have to rely on my own strength. It is worthless, and so feeble. But the Lord? He is strong enough. Strong enough to heal you, strong enough to see us through whatever happens, strong enough to show His glory through any circumstance, no matter how hard. More than strong enough to be there for you and all our family.

     Strong enough to bear my worries and fears, and strong enough dry all my crying. He loves you, Gracey, and so do I. I won't stop praying...
                                                                                         Aunt Clare

If you are curious about Gracey's condition, or just want to know how to join us in prayer, consider following her Facebook page: 
Thank you for praying with us!


  1. Oh Clare, you make me cry every time! I so appreciate your writings! Please tell Robyn and Steve we are praying for them and little Gracie and give them our love. We love you too!

    1. Kim- I will! Thanks so much-this definitely made me cry, but I know the Lord has big plans for this little girl. :)



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