Wednesday, October 22, 2008

If You Listen...

I have really been having some "bad mom" moments lately. It is hard to switch from being half of a pair to going it alone. Especially when the other half it the disciplinarian! Josie and I a seem to butt heads much more frequently than we see eye to eye. I want to be nice, but to be honest she doesn't seem to respond to a bribe as well as she does to a threat. However, there have been some things that we have been doing that are working well. We have been having Friday night "movie night". We put Carson to bed and we watch a girl movie-usually Cinderella (I have got to find something new!) and have "copcorn". Also, we like to go to lunch at Sonic on Saturdays, just the two of us-Carson usually tags along and naps. Eating our lunches (not ever a problem for me, but you have to play along with an almost 3 year old) earns us the "milkashakes" of our choice, "Strawbaberry" for me and "Peanut Butter Budge" for Josie, as she puts it.

I am learning to stand my ground and not be such a pushover. She seems to be responding better to the mix of "special fun times" and more consistent discipline. She wants to spend more time with me since her dad is gone so I have been trying to make sure she gets it. She wanted me to lay in bed with her last night (yes, me laying in her little toddler bed with her looks as funny as you would think) and sing to her. She has never done that before and I was very honored. As we lay there I tried to think of songs that would make appropriate bed time tunes for a toddler and I remembered one from my childhood. My Grams used to have a little tape she always played for us when we rode in her car and this was my favorite:

If you listen,
you can hear,
the voice of Jesus whispering in your ear:
"I'll never leave you or forsake you dear,
I'm right here with you,
what is there to fear?"
If you listen,
you can hear.
Jesus whisper in your ear.
"My child, my child, don't you know?
I love, I love, I love you so!
I'll never, ever let you go!"
Jesus whispers in your ear.
It made me cry. I think the Lord used it to remind me that I am never going it alone unless I choose to. He doesn't yell at me or use hysterics to get my attention, and to remind me that Jocelyn needs me right now, like I need Him. I just have to keep reminding myself that I want to be the kind of Parent He is. I need to listen to Josie and make sure she knows how much I love her without letting her get away with everything. I also need to respond as a child to Him; listening to His discipline and making sure I set aside special times just to be with Him. I am so thankful He is always with me and forgives me even when I am having a "bad mom" day. Now if only I can get Josie to... :)

9 comments:

  1. Lara,
    You have to stop making me cry when you post! You wrote that song down for me during a bad time a couple of years ago and I still have it in one of my bibles and sing it to myself when I am lonely:)

    P.S. Tell Josie when she comes to visit Aunt Robyn I will take her to Sonic and she doesn't even have to eat her lunch and I will Still buy her "peanut butter budge" just so I can hear her say it:) Love~Me

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  2. I bet you are an amazing mom honey - I can't imagine going it alone but God is most certainly there with you every day!

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  3. I don't know if you revisit your posts to see if there are belated comments but I can't confessing how I routinely have to remind myself that God doesn't yell... may He help me to be a much sweeter sounding instrument for Him.

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  4. Do you happen to know the title of that song? My mom had a tape for me when I was little and it still lingers in my memory. I now have a little one of my own and I would like to find this so I can play it for him.

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    1. Same here! I have been searching for it for years. My brother and I sang this in church one Sunday and it pops into my head every once in awhile.

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    2. Still one of my favorite songs-so simple, but so true! Thanks for stopping by and reminding me about this post, it has been a while. :)

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    3. I have looked and looked for it, and I haven't had any success...too bad, because I would love to have that old tape to play to my kids, but I don't even remember what the name of the album was. :(

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  5. My dad bought this cassette tape for me when I was a little girl I am now 43 years old and I don't have the cassette tape anymore I have however saying this to both my children and I love this song even though it makes me cry I would love to hear this song again but I can't seem to remember what the name of the song was or who sang it so if you know who sings that are what the name of the song is please feel free to message me I've also shared your link on my Facebook page I find it very breathtaking and I hope all is going well for you thanks

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    Replies
    1. Tammie-
      Unfortunately, I have the same problem! I don't have the tape, and I've searched high and low for the song name with no success. If I ever find it I'll be sure to let you know.

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